DEAR DEIDRE: I AM torn between staying with my wife or taking a chance . . . with a guy.
I am 46 and my wife is 42. We have been married for five years after both being divorced.
We get on OK but the chemistry that we had in the beginning has disappeared.
It feels as though we are a million miles apart and rarely even look at each other any more.
I have been secretly chatting to gay men online. I feel guilty about it but I can’t seem to stop.
There is one man in particular who caught my eye and we’ve been chatting a lot.
Keep up to date on social
For more Dear Deidre content, and to meet the team behind the infamous agony page, follow us on:
Instagram – @dear.deidre
Facebook – @DearDeidreOfficial
Twitter – @DearDeidre
He is around my age, very sexy and I find myself becoming aroused when we chat.
We have exchanged photos of one another. He is single and has encouraged me to accept who I am.
I am starting to believe he is right and I think that I really might be gay because I have developed feelings for him.
We have yet to meet but I know it is only a matter of time. At that point there will be no going back. I love my wife and we do still have sex occasionally. But lately I can hardly get aroused and when I do, I have an image of this guy in my head.
Get in touch with Deidre
Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
Send an email to [email protected]
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
My wife will be devastated if I confess to her but I know I am probably living a lie. I don’t know what to do.
I don’t want to hurt her but I want to be happy, and if that means confessing and setting her free, then surely that is the right thing to do.
My feelings are so confused.
Most read in Dear Deidre
Linda catches her gardener John in bed with her daughter
I’ve agreed to lose my virginity with seven mates in an orgy in Magaluf
My best friend's husband cheated on her and so she drunkenly kissed mine
Our sex life has reignited and I am suspicious my wife has been cheating
DEIDRE SAYS: This is an agonising situation. We can’t choose our sexuality and you need to work out the right path for you before you implode.
Our sexuality is on a spectrum, and many develop an attraction for people of the same gender at different stages of their lives.
Sometimes it is temporary, sometimes long-lasting. You will also be drawn to the excitement and the newness of this whole situation.
Although you have not physically touched this man, you have built an emotional connection with him.
You need to decide if you want to work on your relationship with your wife or explore this new relationship and unfamiliar side to your sexuality.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
Sylvie’s eager to get the garden sorted for summer
My boyfriend took me out for my birthday but spent the evening on TikTok
Start by finding some support – contact Switchboard LGBT+ (switchboard.lgbt, 0300 330 0630).
When you feel clearer about your future, you can talk to your wife. My support pack Bisexuality explains more.
Source: Read Full Article